Bie


Friday, September 25, 2009
Went to Marina Barrage in the evening, first time there!
The fresh air, the green field, the laughter of kids, people flying kite, kids running around.
Realise that Sylva do act like an child sometimes! hahaha, just find him kind of cute.
Looking at them enjoying themselves so much, it remind me of my family ... I can't remember when is the last time that the whole family of mine had dinner together, relaxing, enjoying ... whenever we go out, there's always one missing out.
Holding on to my tears, not to let anyone see it. Don't wanna spoilt their day anywhere.
well, afterall, really enjoy my thurday night out with charlie and sylva. they just can't stop making me laugh with their silly moves and jokes.
Thinking about it now, it still make me smile.
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The date to India trip is getting closer, yet the excitement inside me is getting lower.
I don't know why, Feeling half empty, I know I should be looking forward and enjoy myself, crazy night with pals, making nice memory, making new friends, Takes tons of pictures, indeed i am. but maybe just 50% or 45% or 30% or 10%.
I'm going on Sunday, yes, 2more days to go. coming back on my birthday.
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I'm not looking forward for my birthday anywhere,
No one will remember it anywhere.
No parties, No celebrating, No bbq, Its just another normal Saturday.
I don't need any present, don't need any parties, don't need a big gathering of all my friends
All i want is just have a small lil simple cake, with my family around, singing birthday song with me. and i'd be really glad. but i know, this would never happend.
Mum gotta work, dad gotta work, brother got his own thing to busy with.
I don't wanna be so selfish, to take up their time, just to sing that stupid birthday song with me, for the sake of singing.

Sometimes i really wish i will never grow up, I remember, when i was a kid, daddy mummy will always be there, inviting people to my hus, big birthday cake, wearing something nice, everyone can't wait to wish you happy birthday, can't wait to take pictures with you ..
its just like u know .. like a lil princess ...
Sad to say, there will always be a ending for fairytale.
some sad, some happy ending. whats mine?
But hey,
I still got my dogs right...
They will be there waiting for me back home, waiting for my return, they will sing birthday song with me, blow the candles with me, lick the small lil cake in my small lil room right.
yea. we'll gonna be happy.
and we will.


Tears is rolling down my cheek, and i just cant stop it.
Sorry readers, i guess, i gotta end it here today.

Take care and had a good week ahead.


abbie-

Posted by Bie at 5:36 PM |

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